I started my camping trip on Saturday, June 2nd. I was filled with fears and challenges for a bit, and those are stories for another day.
By Thursday I’d arrived. My body, mind & spirit were all with me, finally, balanced and present in this place. I’d assimilated to the point that I could audibly hear my own vibrational frequency (something I’ve been able to do for years but only recently really understood). I spent most of the day in conversation with my second group of tree friends. This group offered me blessings, peace; something sacred and beautiful, while the first group gave me strength, comfort and protection. I remembered what day it was (with some effort!) and realized that the next day would kick off the weekend. It was likely there would be some new campers arriving this afternoon. I’d finally fallen in rhythm with the silence and solitude of this empty campground. “Please, Universe” I said “Give me just this day just like this.” Within a moments time I watched a white truck begin to make it’s way toward the beach. It slowed. It turned. It weaved it’s way through the dozen empty campsites in my “backyard”.
Nooo, no, no, no, NOOOO!” I thought, more and more frantically as it came to a stop FEET BEHIND MY TREE FRIENDS- in direct line of my vision...
“Really, God?” “This is a joke, right?!” “REALLY PEOPLE? There are about 4 campsites taken out of 100 in this whole entire place and THIS is the one you chose??? What in the world is this all about?” I went from bliss to WTF in about three breaths.
As they surveyed their site with seemingly no knowledge of me-which was impossible as I’m the only human anywhere within vision and I have a 22 ft camper- I automatically sent my wolves out, well, I didn’t actually send them-they just leaped. Its been years since I let the wolves out, but I wanted my day! I considered and had accepted that if they stayed there was a reason for it and committed to go with the flow and find their meaning, but if I could possibly have an affect on the situation, I really wanted to bask in the peaceful solitude I’d found for just one more day.
After about 30 minutes I decided to try out my power. Looking back that really cracks me up. I’ve been making shit happen for 20 years and I STILL don’t KNOW IT?! Anyhow, I begin chanting in my head, eyes fixed : “Go Somewhere Else..Go Somewhere Else..Go somewhere else.” I gently beat the tree trunk I'd been using as my footrest with my foot. Once. Twice. Double hit. 5 minutes. And back into the truck and away they went. And I lived happily ever after. HA HA HA.
But seriously, my fears melted in that instant because I reconnected and identified with the powerful part of my soul that makes things happen. I remember thinking “stop doubting who you really are” which came with a sense of myself double my height and seriously badass.(But all Light and Love of course!)
The Heart, The Porcupine, the Witch Tree & the Voodoo Woman
The Heart: That evening I went to bed earlier than usual & left all the windows open (fear was gone!). I began a heart meditation to fully connect with that part of myself-which is actually a challenge for me. (I’ve put much effort into my mind, body, spirit over the years, but none into my heart; which obviously, now I’m beginning to work on). The goal of the meditation is to feel your heartbeat throughout your entire body as that heartbeat is the same heartbeat of the earth. My fingers placed on the inside of my wrist I deepened my breaths. I found my pulse and suddenly began to hear a humming sound. Lower in key and in the actual placement of it than my vibrational frequency, (my default vibration extends across the middle of my forehead and is a thin line, and this humming was much thicker and was centered across my ears.) I wondered if the single guy up at site 94 might have music on. There was an ebb and flow to this hum, unlike the vibration I’m accustomed to which is a solid sound…but I can still hear, feel sense that vibration too. They are simultaneously happening now.
I was distracted by it. “No, not music…a machine of some kind? An engine far off in the distance?” I became frustrated by it eventually but kept my fingers on my pulse and continued to try to feel my heartbeat in my chest. I fell asleep like that.
The next morning I had my coffee outside with my first group of Tree Friends, as my second group was no longer mine alone-my next door neighbors had arrived while I slept (with all the windows open and I hardly noticed-fear was GONE!). I was enjoying what I knew would be my last time alone with this group when all at once my heart was beating in my entire upper body, arms and hands, the hum I heard in meditation was back in my head/ears and the trees were pulsing with the heartbeat. I could see it, feel it, hear it; I was in it. I was vibrating in the Universal heart frequency!! And it was wonderous and perfect.
The Porcupine: Tina had arrived and while we finished our coffee I had my first critter visit all week (besides squirrels, chipmunks and of course birds): A PORCUPINE! He was missing his quills and moseyed around my site snacking for about a half hour. When he left, I looked up the symbolism/medicine of the porcupine.
I immediately identified with the first element: "The porcupine spirit animal teaches you to face your weaknesses and vulnerabilities head-on." And I pretty much dismissed the second. The whole trip til now had been about facing my vulnerabilities and weaknesses head-on. Thanks for the validation Mr. Porcupine!
Tina and I walked toward the beach and came toward a new camper. A slight woman in a white wide brimmed hat, a white long-sleeved shirt, a thin white quilted vest with gold zippers, white slacks and white shoes removed items from her spotless vehicle. “Crazy” shot through my head. I didn’t think it. It was spoken-whispered with lightening speed. I’d learned during this week that some people aren’t camping because they want to, and those folks usually aren’t up for greetings-and as well, many people aren’t up for greetings before they’re assimilated to the place even if they are camping for enjoyment. The woman’s car was filled to the brim, I mean practically bursting, but perfectly organized and as I already mentioned, spotless. She wasn’t up for greetings. And she WAS crazy-but why was I judging? And with such an ugly word? Unusual. I wondered.
About ten minutes later on our way back from the beach another porcupine crossed our path! My second critter encounter! This one DID have it’s quills. And for a split second, I got chills.A second porcupine….what was the second element of the porcupine’s symbolism? The one I’d dismissed? I pulled out my phone and opened the screenshot I’d taken. “do what you must to protect yourself from anyone or anything that means you harm”. Well, okay…that’s a little unsettling…But…I’m good. I shrugged.
Back at the campsite my backyard neighbors began to fill in. The weekend was officially starting. I moved my chair and looked around for what my third group of tree friends would be, and there was only one option left with no view of tents, vehicles or people. I set up my chair and sat down, excited to see what I’d be offered from this group-and gasped.
The Witch Tree: I was facing the mouth of a spacious almost-full circle of pine trees. If I’d walked straight ahead 30 feet I would’ve completed the circle myself. Directly in the center of the circle stood a nearly dead pine whose branches had all been cut off; she was 70 feet of spikes. I had a quick sense of witchery. She was immediately foreboding and I was immediately uncomfortable in her presence. I considered moving my chair out of her direct line, but thought better of it. The two other groups of trees had offered me exactly what I needed in the time I spent with them. I would hear her out. I decided to make sure that no matter where I moved the chair that afternoon, I would line up at this angle outside the circle and in a straight line to her. She had a deep wisdom and she wanted to offer it to me. I’d open. I’d tune in to her often and at one point startled Tina when I exclaimed aloud “But why do you want to give me your spikes?!” Eventually, when the sun was down, I somewhat reluctantly accepted them and I thanked her, although I still had no idea why she was offering and what I might need them for.
The Voodoo Woman: Night was falling and Kathy had arrived. I left she and Tina at the campfire while I went off to the restrooms. I recognized the spotless car and the woman in white walking in ahead of me by about 50 yards. I was intrigued and a little excited for whatever experience was about to happen.
I entered the bathrooms and all this happened simultaneously: Woman reached out of stall to close her stall door. Our eyes met. I said “Hi!” She spat “GO TO HELL” with ferocity. I SAW her words leave her mouth. She spewed a green smoke. I heard “Voodoo” in my head. She’d removed her hat and her scalp was covered in raw, bloodied lesions, open wounds, scabs, ect.
I replied “Okay!” easily, meaningfully and “no contest-edly”. LOL. I entered my stall and she began to put curses on me. She continued until I left the restrooms (or at least that’s all I heard).
There was not one second that she affected me-AT ALL, in ANY way. Porcupine Quills & Pine Tree Spikes, they work every time! Lol.
We did what we needed with the angels, our protective Masters, and the earth to clear anything that may have followed me out and protect our space. But that was really a formality and for a sense of security. She had zero power over me. I was even slightly humored during her curses! Quite a different reaction given how incredibly fearful I was the first days of my solo camping trip!
These two days reminded me (in no particular order):
1. The Universe is always sending messages. I was so free from distractions and so tuned in to my environment that I was able to see, consider, connect to the gifts and insights as they were being offered-rather than recognizing them in hindsight. -Slow down a bit. If you think something might be a sign, believe it and see where it leads. The Universe is responding, listening, and the earth is helping us. Believe.
2. Trust intuition. -get to know the difference between intuitive thoughts and the judgmental thoughts. They feel different.
3. I am safe and protected as long as I’m perceptive and connected. And, I’m badass powerful. (Voodoo Woman got Nothin’ on me!)
4. The heartbeat is the answer.
5. This is just another page in the stories of my last 20 years. They are meant to be shared, not to be “my little magical secrets” anymore. -find your magic. It’s all around you, waiting for you to notice it.